Richard Gere Called, He Wants His Hair Back
by schnook
Summary: Kuranosuke, hippest kid on the block is offered every fashionista's wet dream. "Stylist to the Negishi campaign?" "Sure. You can do everything. Like decide if all those stuffy politician's suits should have shoulder-pads or not." Perhaps not. At least the campaign poster-designer is cute. In an ugly kind of way. AU.
1. Chapter 01: Bemoaning

**Title: Richard Gere Called, He Wants His Hair Back.**

**Summary: Kuranosuke, hippest kid on the block is offered every fashionista's wet dream. "Stylist to the Negishi campaign?" "Sure. You can do everything. Like decide if all those stuffy politician's suits should have shoulder-pads or not." Perhaps not. At least the campaign poster-designer is cute. In an ugly kind of way. AU.**

**Show/Manga: Kuragehime**

**Pairing: Tsukimi/Kuranosuke**

**A/N: So, AU. I kind of love how this show seems to just pay out politics. Makes me giddy.**

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**Chapter 01: Bemoaning**

Kuranosuke's father was under the impression that just because a single, attractive, self-assured, talented, social, highly-sought after young man didn't have a job, it kind of made him _poor_.

Cute, naïve, befuddled old man. _Honestly_.

Poverty was a result of circumstances, and the last time Kuranosuke checked, he had a pretty damn fine set of circumstances. He had a father, you know, which pretty much sat placidly on number one on the scale of Things You Need Even Though You Don't Want Them list. This was because his father equalled the same position of what had claimed the number one spot on the Things You Need And Will Always Want list, which was his wallet. Succinctly put, _dad equalled wallet_.

There now. Crises averted.

Now all that was needed was to get the old bugger to open his eyes and _see _that _yes_, his son was poor and had no job, and _yes_ it had been hard raising the most gorgeous young man to ever set foot to pavement, but for goodness sake, his son had him, and he had his son. So the bills would always be paid, video games always upgraded, and new fashion lines always perused because he had a father _that cared about his welfare_.

By George, it almost made him want to burst out singing the national anthem.

What he hadn't anticipated, though, was for his father to be a bit of a heartless old bastard (he of course knew his father was both these things, but had somehow always suspected his own natural charm and beauty strong enough to cancel out the effects). Suffice to say that when the old man turned over and decided to die, he left all the green goodness to his eldest son (responsible, practical, mature, _boring_) and left an ultimatum for his youngest son:

_Get a life._

Or something to that effect. There had been morphine hidden in there somewhere, so he was pretty sure his old man had truly meant to say:

_Dear God, you're pretty._

Made more sense that way, anyway.

Now he could have gone all scientific on that one and argued that technically, his life was currently in operation thanks to his actual…_living_, and pointed out that what had been said was merely a result of societal imprinting where last words are always wholesome and life-altering, but he didn't.

Because the old man had well and truly passed on by then, and to be honest, straight thought was proving to be a little difficult.

So.

A few months pass and he's standing in a dull, grey office with three appalling dull, grey people watching him expectantly, and he can't help but think he hasn't gotten one life for himself to play with, but three.

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**A/A/N: So here's how it's going to go down from here on in:**

**Multi-chapter fic with each new chapter 100 words exactly. As you can imagine, this will mean quite a few chapters in order to get through the story. Updated spontaneously but regularly. Reviews loved and cherished, subscribers put upon the Throne of Awesome.**

**Fic start date and time: 17/01/2014, 11:50am, Australian Eastern Daylight Time**


	2. Chapter 02: Recruitment

**Title: Richard Gere Called, He Wants His Hair Back**

**Show: Kuragehime**

**Pairing: Kuranosuke/Tsukimi**

* * *

**Chapter 02: Recruitment**

"Are you familiar with the Negishi campaign?"

He's very tempted to say _no_, but the advertisements running on the telly have been that awful, he can't even block out the cheesy jingle running through his ears.

"Yes, I am."

Everything about the office seemed to call out understated, as if the political team believed that enough grey would be able to make them seem like serious competitors.

From behind a much too large desk, the interviewer and leader of the campaign, Saburouta Negishi, seemed positively tickled.

"I hope you've mentally prepared yourself to become _intimately_ acquainted with us, Kuranosuke Koibuchi."

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**Words: 100**

**Post Date: 20/01/2014**


	3. Chapter 03: Refresh

**Title: Richard Gere Called, He Wants His Hair Back**

**Show: Kuragehime**

**Pairing: Kuranosuke/Tsukimi**

* * *

**Chapter 03: Refresh**

Saburouta Negishi really hadn't changed that much.

He had been a close friend of his father's, starting from some time when the internet wasn't invented, and had remained an existence that popped up now and again to remind the Koibuchi family that time apart didn't always mean grow apart.

He was small, wiry, balding quickly and offering a life line his father probably would have wanted him to accept.

"I want your face in this building, Kuranosuke, my boy. I want to see it every day. You're a good omen, I can tell."

He was also just a little batty.

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**Words: 100**

**Post Date: 23/01/2014**


	4. Chapter 04: Sticky Notes

**Title: Richard Gere Called, He Wants His Hair Back**

**Show: Kuragehime**

**Pairing: Kuranosuke/Tsukimi**

* * *

**Chapter 04: Sticky Notes**

"What division are you aiming for?" A tall man in a poorly-tailored suit asked.

The man was looming behind Negishi, and Kuranosuke was fairly certain his fancy looking earpiece was fake.

"Whatever fancy name you've come up with to represent the section where people do paperwork, sir."

The man smirked. "Office work?"

"Sure, let's go with that."

And Kuranosuke was fairly certain his fate was sealed for a monotonous life of typing and sticking sticky notes in odd places, until a tiny young woman scuttled into the room, ink smudged on her fingers and a pen tucked behind her ear.

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**Words: 100**

**Post Date: 23/01/2014**

**A/N: Two posts in one day! I'm officially celebrating by spouting rhetoric.**

_**Laurel: Thank you ever so much, dear!**_

_**seirra . steinbrecher: Thanks so much for the review! The length of these chapters is a challenge – to reach a point with each new chapter but within very specific confines. (I'm actually finding it quite difficult). But I'm hoping the regular updates make up for it somewhat :)**_


	5. Chapter 05: Revelations

**Title: Richard Gere Called, He Wants His Hair Back**

**Show: Kuragehime**

**Pairing: Kuranosuke/Tsukimi**

* * *

**Chapter 05: Revelations**

Or he supposed he should have noticed things like that, but the monstrosity she evidently believed was suitable work attire was drawing his eye like moth to a flame.

"Ah, Tsukimi. Take the drafts to Hanamori when you've finished," Negishi indicated the tall man with the fake earpiece.

"Absolutely, sir."

"And meet the newest member of the Negishi campaign, dear. Kuranusuke will be a slayer of paperwork."

The small, dowdy thing turned to look up at Kuranosuke, then gave a little gasp.

"You're a _man_," she said, not without a note of apprehension.

"My god," Kuranosuke breathed, "you're a _woman_."

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**Words: 100**

**Post Date: 30/01/2014**


	6. Chapter 06: First Impressions

**Title: Richard Gere Called, He Wants His Hair Back**

**Show: Kuragehime**

**Pairing: Kuranosuke/Tsukimi**

* * *

**Chapter 06: First Impressions**

Kuranosuke's mother had always been the pinnacle of beauty, so it always threw him a little when he met a female that looked decidedly…_frightening_. This specimen obviously held a blatant disregard for personal appearance that sent shivers up his spine.

It wasn't that she was dirty or even unfortunately deformed – for she was neither – instead, it was the blithe ignorance of the fact that after waking up this morning she obviously accidentally wrapped herself in her grandmother's knickers.

On a level, he could sympathise. In the morning haze he had once spritzed himself with Calvin Klein's _Heat_ instead of _Black_.

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**Words: 100**

**Post Date: 04/02/2014**


	7. Chapter 07: Truth

**Title: Richard Gere Called, He Wants His Hair Back**

**Show: Kuragehime**

**Pairing: Kuranosuke/Tsukimi**

* * *

**Chapter 07: Truth**

"I can't hide a truth that's abundantly evident," Negishi was saying. "We're the underdog in this game. Nobody will expect anything from us. We're understaffed, underpaid and overstressed."

Kuranosuke _hmm'd_ and waited for the ultimatum.

"You'll be working hard, Koibuchi."

"Work is exactly what I'm after."

It was Negishi's turn to _hmm_ as he gave the boy an appraising stare not dissimilar to his own late father's.

"We're the underdogs," he repeated, "yet we expect a lot from ourselves, even if our vision will never coincide with the majority's expectations."

This was something he _could_ grasp. "We're kindred spirits, then."

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**Words: 100**

**Post Date: 06/02/2014**

**sierra . steinbrecher: Always makes me smile when there's someone who's following chapter by chapter – thanks so much for your reviews! I'm thinking of making every tenth chapter longer (1,000) words, as something to look forward to and also give the story more body :)**

**Beautifuly Mad: I hope it won't disappoint! And thanks for dropping by ;) **


	8. Chapter 08: Lavender

**Title: Richard Gere Called, He Wants His Hair Back**

**Show: Kuragehime**

**Pairing: Kuranosuke/Tsukimi**

* * *

**Chapter 08: Lavender**

It wasn't until his second day of work that Kuranosuke ran into what he dubbed in his mind _'The Mess.'_

This time it was muted lavender, and while it was a step up from grey, it was a far cry from anything on the colour wheel. He wondered if his coral tie and patterned shirt could trigger some form of hypothermic shock.

There was that, and then there was the fact that she had _literally_ run into him.

He supposed he ought to prioritize.

"Rushing?"

There was only a frantic head shake against his chest.

Well, it was a start.

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**Words: 100**

**Post Date: 09/02/2014**


	9. Chapter 09: Vermillion

**Title: Richard Gere Called, He Wants His Hair Back**

**Show: Kuragehime**

**Pairing: Kuranosuke/Tsukimi**

* * *

**Chapter 09: Vermillion **

"Are you epileptic? Is _everyone_ here epileptic? Because I swear, this shirt's not even a three on the outrageous scale."

A push against his elbow, and a muffled squeak that sounded suspiciously like dying.

"It's _coral_, not _red_. And while I appreciate your tenacity towards blending with the architraves, a little colour and angles wouldn't go astray. You know what I'd like to see? A little vermillion. Even if you hid it on your toes in your _shoes_, just the _knowledge_ that it's there would-"

He had no choice but to stop abruptly, because she was staring up at him.

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**Words: 100**

**Post Date: 14/02/2014**


	10. Chapter 10: Sledgehammers

**Title: Richard Gere Called, He Wants His Hair Back**

**Show: Kuragehime**

**Pairing: Kuranosuke/Tsukimi**

* * *

**Chapter 10: Sledgehammers **

The last time a girl stared up at him like that was when she was in his bed, but this gaze in particular held a curious light.

"_Vermillion_?"

There it was again, that strange curiosity leaping and clinging to her words.

"Or Mauve or a deep blue - Parisian or Delft," he paused, and then added as an afterthought, "They're your colours."

"My colours?" She tested the idea on her tongue, but obviously found it wanting.

"You know, what looks best on you, what compliments your hair and skin tone..."

Her responding stare was fair indication that _no, she didn't know._

Repressing a sigh, he braced himself. If there was one thing Kuranosuke hated, it was explaining himself to an unappreciative audience. Here he had an audience, but close to no clue as to her level of appreciation. All he had was that brief flash of curiosity to go on.

He decided to go with the honest explanation. "I'd like you to think about these colours, not because I think you're, er, _underdressed_, or because they'll change who you are," here he paused, and gave her a slight grimace, as if he was going to regret his next words. "I'd like you to consider them because they've been waiting this whole time for you to glance their way."

A small, goofy smile blossomed for him, and he didn't feel like such a fool for saying something his grandmother would probably want embroidered on a throw pillow. It seemed honesty would be the way to go with this one.

"I've got to go," she told him, cradling a stack of paperwork to her chest while still somehow managing to indicate it with her chin. "But," she frowned, "all the best with the job?"

"Thanks?"

"Well. Bye?"

"Sure. I think?"

_We're ever so decisive_, Kuranosuke thought dully. _Think manly thoughts, come on!_

She scuttled off before he had a chance to prove his minute masculinity, even before he had the chance to register people still s_cuttled._ He had always thought it was one of those literature things – people scuttling about like mice and turning blue in the face. All those idioms and metaphors that never actually happen in real life – and there she went, literally scuttling, slightly blue in the face.

The whole exchange, brief and pitiful as it was, left him slightly bewildered. Would the next year or two be like _this_? Awkward office ties and dull paperwork. Overbearing bosses with eccentric right-hand men. Stilted conversation and, perhaps worst of all, bad fashion sense.

Surely it would be like a slow sucking away of the soul. He belonged in the spotlight –always had – not in a corner office cubicle with day-old sandwiches.

Okay. Perhaps he was a drama queen.

(_But he lived for drama, and never in history had there been such a Queen!)_

"Kid?" A balding middle-aged man with the ugliest tie in human history was standing below him, startling him from his reverie.

Right. Work.

"I'm working," he hissed to the man, then tried to salvage his dignity somewhat. "On something _very_ important."

"Heh," the man grumbled. "Work on your very important matter _at your desk_, kid."

* * *

Tsukimi came to Tokyo two days after her eighteenth birthday, armed with nothing but several severe delusions and a nasty head cold.

The first and foremost delusion was apparent even to strangers.

Tsukimi was most certainly not outgoing, especially seeing that her primary fear was _going out_. A curious infant grew into a dim yet kind sort of child, which then grew into a shy teenager, and after a few years, an exceptionally withdrawn young woman emerged.

_It's not that she doesn't know what to say_, her father used to explain to his friends. _She just doesn't know how to say it_.

It was an explanation that made things seem a bit better, and lessened people's worry. But it wasn't entirely the truth, and it nagged at her memory sometimes, urging her onto things she didn't really like to dwell on.

Her mother, on the other hand, had her own way of looking at things.

_It's not that she doesn't know what to say_, she would tell her friends. _She just refuses to say it._

It was a shame the woman was gone now. It was just one of the things she would've liked to ask her about – the other things mainly comprised of how to cook that special something-or-rather, does the white wash go in warm or cold water? Where ever did you leave the special pegs you brought back from that shopping trip down South?

If something must be said of Tsukimi's late mother, now seems like a better time than ever to say it:

She was a good woman, in every way the word _good_ can be fulfilled.

But she left numerous puzzles, even going so far as to taking some of the pieces with her, leaving a grieving husband and lost child.

It's all probably just one of the reasons Tsukimi hates introspection.

In any case, moving from the country with her shyness looming behind her like an overloaded backpack seemed like a good idea to get a fresh start. Maybe crack open her shell – pry it open slowly and surely with tweezers, exercising art and precision. It hadn't occurred to her that the backpack of shyness in the country would seem like twenty large suitcases in the center of an eccentric, bustling city.

So she found a small room in an old apartment building, found companionship with like-minded people, unpacked her bags and set out on a job she didn't love, but could do well in. And after three years, she settled into her place in this new city that didn't seem so different from home after all, and eventually forgot her initial whirlwind plan of carefully prying open her shell and stepping outside those carefully constructed boundaries into a new way of thinking.

It never occurred to her someone would come along with a sledgehammer.

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**Words: 1,000**

**Post Date: 14/02/2014**

**A/N: Not only two posts in one day, but 100 word turned into 1,000 to commemorate the tenth chapter! Next 1,000 words will be at Chapter 20, and so on.**

**For more Kuragehime, **_**From A to Z **_**has finally been updated (or **_**FATZO**_**, as I like to call it – also, affectionate shout out to MACKINLEY, who pushed it forward), and **_**STDs and all things Merry**_** will be receiving a new one-shot soon :) **

**Review, Favourite, Subscribe, but most importantly, enjoy the day.**


	11. Chapter 11: Epiphany

**Title: Richard Gere Called, He Wants His Hair Back**

**Show: Kuragehime**

**Pairing: Kuranosuke/Tsukimi**

* * *

**Chapter 11: Epiphany **

He saw her again one hour later; thirty-five minutes before he could knock off and escape the perpetual stack of paperwork.

This time, she had Hanamori and Negishi himself in tow.

He sincerely hoped she hadn't _tattled_ on him for giving life-saving advice.

As they approached, he heard Negishi murmur to _The Mess_.

'_Are you sure?'_

Another guileless smile.

'_Absolutely.'_

It was then Kuranosuke realised the little chit had dobbed him in for who-knows-what, and the old fool, that was supposedly friends with his late father, would believe that smile over his own mug and fire his skinny little ass.

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**Words: 100**

**Post Date: 19/02/2014**


	12. Chapter 12: Denial

**Title: Richard Gere Called, He Wants His Hair Back**

**Show: Kuragehime**

**Pairing: Kuranosuke/Tsukimi**

* * *

**Chapter 12: Denial **

"_Idindot!"_

All three loomed slightly over his little desk, distracted by the bobble head dog that agreed – quite vehemently – with what had just shot out of Kuranosuke's mouth.

"Beg your pardon?"

He tossed a mildly disgruntled look at Negishi, who smiled patiently. "_I didn't do it_," he reiterated.

Thick eyebrows shot up. "Do what, son?"

Risking a glance at The Mess, who stood only slightly behind Hanamori, he couldn't pick up any mastermind-_y_ vibes. If possible, she seemed somewhat sheepish.

"Nothing, sir. Just wondering why a hot-shot like yourself has time to check up on a poor office boy, sir."

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**Words: 100**

**Post Date: 21/02/2014**

**A/N: Ermegerd, the story is kind of **_**starting**_** now: plot and all that nonsense. New chapters twice a day over the weekend :) **


	13. Chapter 13: Campaigning

**Title: Richard Gere Called, He Wants His Hair Back**

**Show: Kuragehime**

**Pairing: Kuranosuke/Tsukimi**

* * *

**Chapter 13: Campaigning **

The annoying thing about Negishi was this: His albeit incredible political mind had the tendency to fluctuate between resounding insight and fits of girlish laughter. This time, the laughter broke out, and everyone in the small office tried awfully hard not to wince.

"I _am_ busy," he acknowledged, "but the_ real _work starts tomorrow."

"The campaign trail," Kuranosuke acknowledged. He'd seen flyers and schedules floating about the building for the past few days.

"The holy grail," he was corrected. "One month. One last chance to tip the poles. And here we are, ready, with a _dire_ problem on our hands."

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**Words: 100**

**Post Date: 22/02/2014**


	14. Chapter 14: Recruiting

**Title: Richard Gere Called, He Wants His Hair Back**

**Show: Kuragehime**

**Pairing: Kuranosuke/Tsukimi**

* * *

**Chapter 14: Recruiting **

He clenched his jaw, and swore he wouldn't go down without a fight. Hell, he'd have to find a job where he actually had to _do stuff_.

"I'm very disappointed in you…Tsukimi told me."

_Tsukimi. _So the she-devil had a name. He swore (for the second time in one minute) he'd carve her name out with obscenities into the toilet cubicle door. _And that'll be just the beginning._

"Our stylist's cancelled at the last minute, and the public are already in an uproar about my last tie," Negishi gave a rare sardonic smile. "We need you."

_What the fu-…oh._

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**Words: 100**

**Post Date: 22/02/2014**


	15. Chapter 15: Red

**Title: Richard Gere Called, He Wants His Hair Back**

**Show: Kuragehime**

**Pairing: Kuranosuke/Tsukimi**

* * *

**Chapter 15: Red **

If he was to understand correctly, it seemed he was being propositioned to play dress-up with his boss.

"I'm sure you'll do just fine on your own, sir." Even as he said it, he felt his eye twitch. He reigned in his instincts. There was no way he was going to spend the next month picking out boxers for a forty-five-year-old man.

"Son, if I had my way, high-pants would be back and I wouldn't even have to wear a shirt in public. And God knows the only time Tsukimi's looked like a professional was that time she wore red."

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**Words: 100**

**Post Date: 23/02/2014**


	16. Chapter 16: Tidbit

**Title: Richard Gere Called, He Wants His Hair Back**

**Show: Kuragehime**

**Pairing: Kuranosuke/Tsukimi**

* * *

**Chapter 16: Tidbit **

"_Pardon_?" He couldn't help himself. Suddenly the crazy shindig seemed…doable.

She had the good grace to look embarrassed. Or it may have been real embarrassment. He studied her for a moment. Red cheeks, rigid posture, and an apparent staring competition with her regrettably non-vermillion toes.

Probably the latter.

Negishi gave her a great, whooping pat on the back, almost knocking her over. "Oh yeah," he announced, like a proud father, "Couldn't recognise her for the life of me. Walked into the party, wobbling on the highest pair of shoes I've seen since 1973, and promptly toppled over head-first into the-"

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**Words: 100**

**Post Date: 23/02/2014**


	17. Chapter 17: Bright Red

**Title: Richard Gere Called, He Wants His Hair Back**

**Show: Kuragehime**

**Pairing: Kuranosuke/Tsukimi**

* * *

**Chapter 17: Bright Red**

Apparently he was never to know what she landed face-first in.

"_Iwerntll ay?"_ Negishi tried to announce from behind Tsukimi's hand (which had flown like Pegasus to protect her dignity).

"It was just a stupid party," she affirmed shakily, effectively ending that train of conversation. She removed her hand, but not before giving her employer a very pointed look that seemed at odds with her usual meek nature.

"Kuranosuke," Negishi addressed him, political persona back. "I first requested to see your face every day, and you delivered. I have another request. _I want to see her happy in red again."_

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**Words: 100**

**Post Date: 03/03/2014**

**A/N: I just want ya'll to know that it's absolutely **_**sweltering **_**here on Oz – despite it approaching Autumn – and I've gotten off my lazy, dehydrated butt to update. Praise me, babies, **_**praise me**_**.**

**(I had aimed to make that sound as non-creepy as possible, but alas. The stalker inside.)**


	18. Chapter 18: Allure

**Title: Richard Gere Called, He Wants His Hair Back**

**Show: Kuragehime**

**Pairing: Kuranosuke/Tsukimi**

* * *

**Chapter 18: Allure**

He'd dressed up plenty of girls in his time. It had never been a fascination with women so much as it had been with the clothes, the jewels, the glamour. He'd even dressed _himself_ up every now and again, simply to sate this incredibly intense desire.

He supposed he just wasn't in the habit of denying himself beautiful things.

So he tried to imagine The Me-_Tsukimi_, timid and meek and curious all at the same time, wrapped up in that red thing she was so desperate to hide. But it was that pointed look that convinced him in the end.

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**Words: 100**

**Post Date: 04/03/2014**

**A/N: A particular shout-out to **_**sierra . steinbrecher **_**for reviewing like a **_**boss**_**, and **_**Snowy**_**'s comment, which made me all excited since I've never actually seen more than a cup of snow in real life, and am therefore considering her (?) something of a scientist. **


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